Don't say you'll stay when you wanna leave.
A couple of lines that I can't follow with more... I guess I had the moment and lost it for writing. Sometimes that's how it goes. Those just popped in my head. Anyway, I know I titled the blog "Ceramics, Tea, and other things"... but I haven't been writing much about tea at all. Honestly I haven't been drinking much tea besides iced black plain tea lately. I have been lazy and busy and the weather isn't quite that cold yet. Yes, it did snow the other day. It didn't stay for long. I have been brewing some delicious rooibos gingerbeer. This last batch I decided to add some kava kava root bark into the rooibos ginger decoction. It changed the flavor... it is a little more robust like rootbeer. I'm not sure if I like it... but it is basically tea with sugar and yeast added to it. That's how it relates to tea. That's the only other tea I have really been drinking besides black. My big bag of herbs is staying full for the meantime.
Apparently people perceive me as somewhat shy and quiet and frail, according to my mom. It comes across as weakness to some. I didn't realize that shyness came across as weakness. It's just my personality... but I am definitely ambitious, strong, and goal-oriented. I do have a few weak points, but I know what I have a passion for and I know what I want and what I don't want. I am still learning about how to get exactly what I want, but I am completely capable. I know that what other people think doesn't really matter in the end as long as I am happy with myself. I know that I have the freedom to make my own decisions, and I can take charge and make resolute decisions as soon as I know what I want. I can't make a decision until I have a goal. I know that I have a passion for functional art and the intimate feel of wet clay running through my fingers. The curve of a silhouette of a perfect bowl or cup makes me happy. The science behind the magic of glaze transformation inside the kiln intrigues me. The wide array of possibility within form and function and artistic approach of a ceramic piece drives me on. I love what I am doing right now with my life. I can't imagine not having clay in my life now that I have had the opportunity. I know what I love. I know what I want. I know that I can get what I want once I define what it is. Other people who perceive me as weak don't know me at all. No, I don't trust easily so it takes some time for me to get to know people and vice-versa, but if they take the time to get to know me, they know that I am driven. I have confidence and purpose, and I just need to surround myself with other people who can see that.
Weekends on campus always feel so long for some reason. Sundays are the longest days. I helped to brick up a small wood kiln on Friday night and put in some time working at the wood lot splitting wood for the big double-wide firing at the end of the month. After that I went to take my shift for the wood firing that I helped load on Friday. When I got there, the kiln was in the cooling process. I down-fired it at 15 degree intervals for about an hour, and then Megan showed up to help me stuff the fire box, pull out the great bars, and stuff the fire box again. I hammered off the great bars until they were comparatively clean, and then she said that we were basically finished. We just had to seal up all of the cracks in the firebox where the removable bricks were. When I went for cleanup today, the kiln was still at around 550 degrees Fahrenheit. We are planning to unload it tomorrow night. I am excited to see the results on the pieces that I was able to put in the kiln-- three mugs and two bigger pieces. Hopefully my pots got some flashing and all of the ash melted so the surfaces are smooth and functional. It was a high temperature wood firing where we held the kiln at cone 10 for about 6 hours (and it got even hotter-- cone 11 was flat as well). I hope it was a successful firing. Oh, I got one very happy mug out of the gas firing on Friday, but the rest of my pieces need to be re-glazed and fired. The glaze was mixed too thin. Anyway, here is a collective photo of cups :)
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